Tuesday, February 28, 2006


That's my bike that is. She's been ridden now and feels better than ever. Just need an MOT which will probably have to wait until the snow has gone, and the jobs a goodun.

Monday, February 27, 2006

WSB Round 1 - Qatar

Race one result
1 James Toseland (GB) Honda 36mins 31.339secs
2 Troy Bayliss (Aus) Ducati 36:31.427
3 Andrew Pitt (Aus) Yamaha 36:33.729
4 Troy Corser (Aus) Suzuki 36:33.938
5 Michel Fabrizio (It) Honda 36:38.338
6 Alex Barros (Brz) Honda 36:46.056
7 Roberto Rolfo (It) Ducati 36:46.563
8 Pierfancesco Chili (It) Honda 36:52.522
9 Marco Borciani (It) Ducati 36:53.789
10 Max Neukirchner (Ger) Ducati 36:55.271

Race two result
1 Troy Corser (Aus) Suzuki 36:20.395
2 Troy Bayliss (Aus) Ducati 36:21.420
3 Noriyuki Haga (Jpn) Yamaha 36:23.857
4 James Toseland (GB) Honda 36:23.858
5 Andrew Pitt (Aus) Yamaha 36:24.745
6 Lorenzo Lanzi (It) Ducati 36:40.005
7 Alex Barros (Brz) Honda 36:40.943
8 Michel Fabrizio (It) Honda 36:41.578
9 Karl Muggeridge (Aus) Yamaha 36:43.593
10 Ruben Xaus (Sp) Ducati 36:46.928

Riders' Championship
1 Troy Bayliss (Aus) 40pts
2 Troy Corser (Aus) 38
= James Toseland (GB) 38
4 Andrew Pitt (Aus) 27
5 Michel Fabrizio (It) 19
= Alex Barros (Brz) 19

Didn't see the racing unfortunately but there's some interesting results there. Toseland taking a win (albeit gifted) and a fourth is encouraging. Add this to Yamaha's apparent competitiveness and this year could be as wide open as it's been in a while.

Friday, February 24, 2006

Friday Fuckwits #7

Alex Muffet at Dropsafe has a frankly astonishing news article from CNN here.

Bikers roll to military funerals to oppose anti-gay protests

....Phelps believes American deaths in Iraq are divine punishment for a country that he says harbors homosexuals. His protesters carry signs thanking God for so-called IEDs -- explosives that are a major killer of soldiers in Iraq.

God bless America, the land of the free to spout this kind of hatred in the name of religion:

Shirley Phelps-Roper, a daughter of Fred Phelps and an attorney for the Topeka, Kansas-based church, said neither state laws nor the Patriot Guard can silence their message that God killed the soldiers because they fought for a country that embraces homosexuals.

"The scriptures are crystal clear that when God sets out to punish a nation, it is with the sword. An IED is just a broken-up sword," Phelps-Roper said. "Since that is his weapon of choice, our forum of choice has got to be a dead soldier's funeral."

Standing up to the morons is 'The Patriot Guard Riders', a 5000 strong group of Motorcyclists who; "shield the families of dead soldiers from the protesters, and overshadow the jeers with patriotic chants and a sea of red, white and blue flags.

If you need any more proof that Islam isn't the only religion with a lunatic fringe here are some pictures of one of the protests. The eagle-eyed among you will spot the young boy in the first picture, second-from-left holding a banner that reads "Your Pastor is a Whore"(?)

I really can't say any more about these people as I fear for the safety of my keyboard. This is the worst kind of bigotry imaginable. It is so filled with fear, hate and violence yet justifies itself by calling it 'Christian'.

I am fuming so i'll leave the last word to Richard Wilbur, a retired police detective; "No one deserves this."

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Tip of the Day #8

Before you spend 45 minutes removing the fuel tank, dismantling the airbox and then fiddling with every electrical connection on the bike to find out why it doesn't start, why not check the cut-out switch on the handlebar first.


Wednesday, February 22, 2006

'Cat update #3

The forks are now back on - thank god. Saturday very nearly saw them being bent into some balloon animal shapes before being hurled forcibly through the nearest wall as a slipping damping rod nut started to turn me green. It turns out that Haynes manuals are incredibly comprehensive, hugely detailed, crammed full of useful photographs and diagrams and are written by someone who hasn't got a fucking clue!

Luckily, mid-Norfolks most insufferable know-it-all turned up at the unit and (surprisingly) actually genuinely knew something for once. In this case, how to stop a damping rod nut from slipping long enough to remove it. He still managed to drive me and everyone else in the unit to near suicide (another candidate for this perhaps?) with his constant bullshit but it was worth it in the end. I suppose I owe him a reluctant 'Thanks Mate!'

Monday night saw the front wheel and brakes reattached, the broken nose cone glued up and the majority of the bodywork back on. Had a bit of fun reconnecting the throttle cable and, as the bike didn't fire up when the battery went in, it looks like i've accidently pulled a plug out somewhere. Bugger, that means tank and airbox off again. Not a big job but a pain all the same. Still hoping to ride it over the weekend ready for an MOT next week followed by tax and first high speed thrash gentle cruise of 2006.


This Mad TV post last week inspired this short story by his dad. If you ride you'll get it, if you don't please try!

Friday, February 17, 2006

British Superbike Dates 2006

Round 1 Mar 26 BRANDS HATCH (INDY)
Round 3 Apr 17 THRUXTON
Round 4 May 01 OULTON PARK
Round 5 May 21 MONDELLO PARK
Round 6 Jun 04 MALLORY PARK
Round 7 Jun 18 SNETTERTON
Round 8 Jul 16 KNOCKHILL
Round 9 Jul 23 OULTON PARK
Round 10 Aug 13 CROFT
Round 11 Aug 28 CADWELL
Round 12 Sep 17 SILVERSTONE
Round 13 Oct 01 BRANDS HATCH (GP)

Brands to finish the year off again then. See you there!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

'Cat Update - the new camera phone edition

Latest on the 'Cat front. Yesterday I spent the day stripping down the rear end to replace the shock absorber using the MotoLadder (patent pending) to make life a bit easier.

I initially thought the problem with the rear end was a knackered shock but it appears that sitting around for the best part of a year has also taken its toll on the swingarm & suspension linkage.

The linkage was totally shot and had seized solid and, though the swingarm itself was usable, it was going to have to be replaced before next winter so I bit the bullet and shelled out for another one. Thanks to Julie at Bentley's Breakers ( 01362 692555) for the good deal.

What do you think of the MotoGP stylee exhaust?

I also managed to get the front end off ready for the dreaded fork seal change and that will hopefully be happening this weekend.

After that it's just a case of getting all the repaired or replacement plastics back on, the new clip-on fitted and the pussycat will be ready for her MOT.

I have had to revise the 'on-the-road' date a tad and now expect to be back up and running the beginning of March. Big thanks to Matt at Motorider for the loan of the workshop and the help. I will update your website soon mate, I promise!

Monday, February 06, 2006

Go on then, offend me.

I'm announcing a new competition. I want to find something that makes people laugh yet will not upset or cause offence to anyone, anywhere, no matter their race, gender or faith. Not even, and I'm going to be totally strict on this point, not even if they still think Burberry is cool.

Events over the last few days have pointed to an obvious need for a completely inoffensive joke that is still able to raise a smile on even the most fundamental extremist's face. A joke that Peter Tatchell can't claim is a gay slur. A joke that everyone from American neo-conservatives to Al-Queda will be able to laugh at and not feel they have to invade or bomb anyone in retribution.

Do you have such a joke? Ask yourself, would Roy 'Chubby' Brown, Bernard Manning and Jim Davidson ever tell it? If the answer's no then I want to hear from you.

Send your one liner / shaggy dog story / danish newspaper cartoon / ITV sitcom script to:
Freepost The World Must Stop Laughing Now
The Blogosphere.

Judging will be by Trevor Phillips and the winner will be announced when Hell freezes over or I laugh at an episode of 'Keeping up Appearances'.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Calling all petrol-heads

Thanks to Blue tealeaf for drawing my attention to this. Sounds like a great idea if it comes off.

Tip of the Day #7

Fifty year old fat, balding, mockney wankers. When someone points out that you've done yet another drawing wrong, instead of correcting it why not just regress to childhood, throw all your toys out the pram and storm out the office.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

More gratuitous traffic generating

For various reasons I haven't been taking any pictures for several months now and my photoblog was gathering a very thick layer of dust. Now though, i'm in the zone again and Darkplanet is back up and running*.

If you haven't ever visited my gallery and journal then you don't know what you're missing. Check it out here and marvel at the images of a man who was once described as 'an incredible photographic talent'**.

*alright, maybe not running but it is out for a brisk walk and may break into a jog anytime soon
**by me this morning