Monday, January 31, 2005

A bit sore and tender.

The biopsy on Thursday went mostly OK. The doctor didn't get enough liver on the first go though so I had to endure a second attempt, which was nice. Sunday morning woke up feeling sick, felt like I was coming down with 'flu or something. Things hadn't got any better by the evening and I was running a temperature of 101 so called the doctor out. Possibly managed to pick up an infection so i'm now on penicillin and bed rest.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Tomorrow I will be mostly...

...having hollow spikes shoved into my body. I am paying a visit to the Norfolk & Norwich University Hospital for a liver biopsy followed by overnight stay and breakfast.

A couple of years ago I got sent to the doctors by Max about stomach pains I kept getting and, a number of blood tests later, it was revealed that I had 'Abnormal LFT's'. (Thats liver function tests to you and me.) I have spent the last two years going back every few months for more blood tests, ultrasounds and on one really don't ever want to do that again occasion, a barium enema. The LFT's have apparently improved over time but are still not normal so the Docs have decided they want a piece of me to take away and study. Oh well, I needed to lose weight anyway.

Words that can no longer be used in polite conversation #1

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Xaus down already!

Ruben Xaus (pronounced chaus these days apparently)has already binned his shiny new M1 on only his second day riding it.
Yamaha were warned.

Monday, January 24, 2005

And now for something completely dreary

Guardian Unlimited has the explanation for certain events on this mornings journey into work.

I'm sorry Mr Audi A4 driver, Reg No. AP52 CGG. I now know that (because you were obviously more depressed than normal) I shouldn't have maliciously stuck to the speed limit in that 50mph zone, forcing you to tailgate me before overtaking despite the cars coming the other way. I apologise for trying to overtake you again when you hit slow moving traffic, meaning you had to swerve all over the road to prevent me passing and then accelerating hard when I did finally go through.

I now realise that you had a valid excuse for mounting the pavement in a built-up area, allowing you to pull up on the inside of me and making it easier to ram me repeatedly into oncoming traffic. I feel nothing but remorse for the damage caused to your tyre as it drove over my foot and your wing mirror, knocked out when it smashed into my elbow. I grovel at your feet as a pathetic example of the human race, not worthy to share road space with you on today of all days.

But most of all I prostrate myself in front of you and beg your total forgiveness for the police officer that is coming round my house in the next couple of evenings to take a statement.


Sunday, January 23, 2005


Thanks to Phil Morris I have come across MP3Search.Ru. For anyone not familiar it's a VERY cheap and totally legitimate music download site. Entire albums work out to somewhere around $1US. Just load up your account for a minimum of $20US and off you go. Is this the webs best kept secret? Someone tell an I-Tune user today!

Friday, January 21, 2005

Village Life

Tonight is the second night of the new Swanton Morley youth club, a project that we have been trying to get off the ground since last September. Unfortunately, a large number of local parish councillors and village hall committee members appear to be suffering from an antiyouth strain of smallmidus villagefolkum, an affliction that makes the sufferer moan and raise objections about anything concerning kids.
It goes something like this.

Old git:
Why do kids always have to hang around on street corners at night. Haven't they got anything better to do? Bloody kids!

Cool and hip youth club committee member:
No they haven't. The (small and unlit) playing field is in a poor state of repair and swings and a roundabout don't really appeal to 11 to 16 year olds anyway! Tell you what, why don't we set up a youth club for this age group on a Friday night at the village hall, you know, that big building built for the good of everyone in the village.

Old git:
I don't want kids down the hall. They've got no respect for property, they'll break everything, spray graffitti in the toilets and take drugs in the shrubbery. Bloody kids!

Cool and hip youth club committee member:
Well, if you don't want them on the streets, and you don't want them in the hall, what do you suggest for them?

Old git:
Why can't they stay locked in their bedrooms every night, we should never have abolished the workhouses. I'm going to write to the Daily Mail about this. Bloody kids!

Well, in the end we prevailed. After a (small) loan and an (even smaller) donation from the parish council and help from some very generous villagers the opening night last week was a blinding success. 21 kids turned up and, by all accounts, had a bloody good time. Hopefully this week will be even better. Now, all we have to do is harrass a few village hall committee members until they relent and offer us a discount on the extortionate room hire. Saying that, Norfolk has lots of pig farms so the chances are i'll see a small squadron of porkers doing a fly-by before that happens.

Monday, January 17, 2005

Whats it all about?

I started off thinking i'd post a couple of reviews for some films I saw over the weekend. Then I got home and learned my friends sister had died and films suddenly seemed small and insignificant.

I know he pops in here sometimes for a read so I just want to say how sorry I am, and mine and Max's deepest love and sympathy go out to the two of you, the boys, your mum & dad and your brother at this time. You know we're here for you mate.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Taxi Bikes Banned

MCN have revealed TfL's latest bit of insanity for London's traffic. They have now banned Taxi bikes because, although there has never been one death or even a serious injury, they are too dangerous. So, remember next time you get conned into a joyride by one of our capitals totally illegal, unregistered mini-cabs, just think to yourself, "Thank god i'm not on a bike".

British Superbike dates 2005

March 26-68 Brands Hatch Indy circuit
April 8-10 Thruxton
April 22-24 Mallory Park
April 30-May 2 Oulton Park
May 13-15 Mondello Park
June 4-6 Croft
June 24-26 Knockhill
July 8-10 Snetterton
August 19-21 Silverstone
August 27-29 Cadwell Park
September 9-11 Oulton Park
September 23-25 Donington Park
October 7-9 Brands Hatch GP circuit.

Because the British MotoGP was moved Donington is now no longer the last meet of the year.
I'm gutted, for the last couple of years we've had a long weekend there to see the season out and it's been a great couple of days. Cheap too, £25 for three days entrance, pit pass and camping is a bargain. Let's hope Brands does a similar thing this year though I doubt it.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

A new year is upon us...

... and it's already off to a less than auspicious start.
There is nothing that already hasn't been said about the terrible events in Asia. I'm not going to dwell on it here other than to say my heart goes out to all those touched in any way at all by the Tsunami. It seems everyone knows someone who didn't make it and I offer my deepest condolences.

On the home front my computer finally gave up the ghost so had to go out and get a new one. Still finding my way round XP (or Peter & Janes first OS). There are some great features in it but can someone tell me how to turn off the Nannying function. Its second guessing is really getting on my wick!

New years eve was pretty much the norm. My wife & I stopped doing anything 31st December after several crap ones, but this year we decided to go to Hunters Hall, a local venue where we got married. There was 18 on our table so it promised to be a great night. Yeah, right! The food was nice enough, the bar prices were reasonable, the entertainment was bloody awful!
It was a Buddy Holly tribute and he didn't have any idea what he was doing. He start at 10 o'clock (!), finished a 11.45 (!!), and then busked for 15 minutes before tuning in to Big Ben on a radio (!!!) and missing the gongs!!!!! So we actually missed New Year. Still, it was great company, thanks guys.